The Evil Eyebrow

So we’ve had this thing in a bag. It’s been in a bag since it was stuffed in there on the morning of July 20, 2003. This thing is Jenn’s wedding dress. It has been in the bag every since, transported from Maine back to Oklahoma by the good graces of my sister where we picked it up and took it home to Texas. It has since moved, twice, in the same bag to Atlanta and then to Marietta. It hasn’t been looked at since.

We’ve discussed the thing in the bag several times in the last seven years, saying that we really should do something about it. Well, I’m doing something about it. We’re getting the blasted thing cleaned and boxed for preservation.¹

I called around to a few places today to see what the nominal charge would be for a wedding dress cleaning and boxing. Everyone on the phone was very nice to me but ladled lots of caveats over the conversation by saying that wedding dress cleaning cost has a floor but no ceiling depending on the complexity of the dress. This makes sense, however I was just trying to get some idea so if they would give me a ballpark estimate, I would be most grateful.

Here is an almost verbatim conversation from the first place I called:

Me: “So if you could just ballpark the cost for me, I’d really appreciate it.”
Them: “Cleaning and preservation starts at $450″
Me: BOOM!
Them: “Are you ok?”
Me: BOOM!
Them: “Sir?”
Me: “I’m sorry, but my head just exploded.”

Wow. I knew it wasn’t going to be cheap, but $450 is a significant fraction (I think something like 2/3) of the original cost of the dress. Holy SHIT! leaps to mind. Thankfully, the place I called first was apparently the top end. That’s what I get for calling the place in Dunwoody first. Others were more what I sort of had in mind, ranging from $175 up to $300.

The lesson here, for me at least, is that wedding dress cleaning and preservation should be built into the cost of the wedding, if not the dress itself. Bridal shops should make that a value-added service. If nothing else, it would keep their dress from being stuff in a bag for seven years.

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¹: I said to Jenn, “We’re either getting in cleaned or getting rid of it.” She said, “Cleaned.” Very good.

When we got married, my wife and I decided that she would keep her last name. There were a lot of reasons for this but one of the most important is that the concept of a wife taking her husband’s name can be taken a bit far, in our opinion. For example, if Jenn had taken my name it would have been proper (but not acceptable by us) for Jenn to be referred to as Mrs. William Ruhsam. This eliminates all but one bit of her identity: her marriage to me. So, instead of being Dr. Bowie, she becomes my appendage. We wanted to make sure that did not occur.

We have joked at times that it would almost be more proper for us to be Dr. and Mr. Bowie, but I digress.

Where am I going with this? I was doing an ego-search today and came across the following engagement announcement: Capt. Ruhsam, Fiancee Plan Wedding in China:

A January wedding at the home of Maj. Gen. and Mrs. John P. Lucas, Nanking, China has been planned by Miss June Mewshaw and Capt. Harry Erwin Ruhsam, grandson of Mrs. William Ruhsam, New London, Wis.

The bride-to-be, daughter of Col. and Mrs. Harry C. Mewshaw, Nanking, is a graduate of the University of Arizona, where she affiliated with Kappa Alpha Theta. Capt. Ruhsam is a member of Alpha Sigma Phi and a graduate of Iowa State University.

The couple will honeymoon in Hong Kong and live in Nanking.

In it, there are seven people mentioned: three men and four women. The only woman who receives the benefit of a name is the bride-to-be. Everyone else is Mrs. Husband’s-name.

For contrast, here’s an announcement I just now pulled from the AJC:

Ben and Paula Team of Snellville, Georgia, are proud to announce the engagement of their daughter Stacey Elizabeth Team to Robert Vincent Scott, son of George and Betsy Scott of Alpharetta, Georgia. The couple became engaged on November 28, 2009 at their favorite park in Milledgeville, Georgia where they both attended Georgia College and State University.
Robert is the grandson of Mary and Vincent Bode of Raleigh, North Carolina and the late Robert and Dorothy Scott of West Union, Iowa. Stacey’s grandparents are Ben and Helen Team of Lexington, South Carolina.
The couple will wed in early fall in the company of family and friends.

This is progress. Let’s keep it up, people.

By the way, Congratulations to Stacey and Robert!

The 2010 Hugo nominations closed last night. The categorical selections for final voting will be announced on April 4. I’m excited! At least, a little bit.

Last year, I had the privilege of randomly having read three of the five nominated novels. I made up the other two in quick order. This year, I haven’t read much that might get placed on the ballot. The only book I’ve read that I would consider for this year’s Hugo nomination was Scott Westerfeld’s Leviathan, but we’ll see. I hear that China Miéville’s The City & The City is worthy, but the Library does not have a copy yet (I’ve also been making an effort to cut down on the number of purchased books. I love paperback swap!)

Once the nominations come out, I’ll either hit up my friends around here who might have the novels, or do some more intensive library searching. After all, I believe I have friends and acquaintances who live in every county and city in the Atlanta Metro area. I can probably convince someone to borrow me a copy of the novel I’m looking for.

On another note, my Hugo Novel Reading Project is coming along. I’ve read The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula LeGuin (didn’t like it) and To Your Scattered Bodies Go by Phillip Jose Farmer (liked it, but not enough to read the sequels). I also added Gateway (liked it) by Frederick Pohl to the list. Then there was Forever Peace by Joe Haldeman. I’ve got no idea why that book won the Hugo. I mean, it was an ok novel, but best novel of 1998? The competition (none of which I’ve read) must be terrible. Then there was Hominids by Robert Sawyer which I just thought was weird (and preachy). I started to read the Yiddish Policeman’s Union by Michael Chabon but couldn’t get into it. I’m very strict nowadays about books that don’t engage me.

I’ve had a good run of past-year’s Hugo novels this year. Hopefully I’ll be able to add this year’s Hugo Nominated books without too much trouble.

TRON! That is all.

We went to see They Might Be Giants last night, opened by Jonathan Coulton. This was both a fun night and an exceptionally long one.

Fun because I got to hang with friends having pizza and beer prior to the concert and enjoying the music during. Long because I was/am sick as the proverbial dog and was having difficulty not just sitting against a wall and listening to the drums in my own head.

Beyond the cold, the concert was a lot of fun. Jonathan Coulton’s music is fun and TMBG’s stuff is also wacky and wild. We were treated to two different sets of music by sock puppets. How often can you say that?

The picture above was taken after TMBG asked everyone to pull out their various video-capable electronic devices and record the song (one of the sock puppet songs). You can see all the various screens lit up.

My Mother-in-Law gave us a plate for Christmas. This plate belongs with our china pattern, Vintage Jewel. When we received it, I commented to Jenn that we should take the plate and upgrade it by getting the rest of the setting, plus one more full setting as that would get us to six total. For our dining room size and how we tend to entertain, six is a good number.

Therefore, off I went to Macy’s! Macy’s was the store of choice because it’s local and I can walk in and actually look at the china patterns to be sure I’m getting the right thing.
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(Well, one of the coolest things…)

This website, brought to my attention by the Bad Astronomer, is just way too much of a time sink. I can sit and play for hours. It is a solar system simulator which lets you play with the initial conditions with up to four different bodies!

As Phil Plait says, start with one of the default solar systems and tinker with it. It’s fun. I especially liked trying to craft odd slingshot trajectories.

Charles Stross has a nice description and discussion of the Book Publishing Contract of Doom! over at his blog today.

It struck a chord with me at this paragraph:

The fourth chunk [of the contract] is about publication dates ….The publisher is required to publish the book within 24 months of the date of acceptance of each book. There are a handful of loopholes (for lawsuits, labor disputes, or government intervention), but if they don’t publish within 24 months I can yell at them in writing: they then have six months to publish, and if they can’t manage that, I get to terminate the agreement, take my rights back, and keep the advance.

I’ve read some novels in the last decade that were written and set in a post 9-11 world. Re-reading them, they seem so quaint with their “I was written in January 2002″ attitude. Things have changed a lot since that time; things have been, charitably, in flux. Basing novels on contemporaneous events¹ can make them seem a bit dated when rereading them at a later time, and based upon the paragraph above, your novel might not even see the light of bookshelves before 2 years after acceptance, much less first draft.

Beware.

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¹: Tom Clancy’s stuff is notorious for this

I ran the Charles Harris Run for Leukemia 10k yesterday in chilly, but sunny, weather (28 degrees farenheit at race start). It was a fun race with a good course. I would do this one again.

The race starts in Tucker, GA and uses Lawrenceville Highway (US 29/SR 8) for the majority of the race course. As advertised, the course is long downhill slopes with a few uphills for a very fast route. If you race and train around Atlanta, the uphills are pretty gentle. At the end of the course, at approximately kilometer 9, the path turns right onto North Druid Hills road and then right again into a neighborhood. This is very important to realize, and I’ll tell you why:

First, a digression. I’m a big proponent of running/biking/driving a race course prior to running a race. It only makes sense! Put some eyes on the course to know what to expect and whether or not there are surprises or things that must be planned for. I did not follow this rule yesterday, for several reasons. Therefore, I had a bit of a surprise at the end of the race.

As I said, the race course is primarily on Lawrenceville Highway which is a 5-lane arterial here in the metro area, servicing traffic commutting to and from eastern DeKalb and western Gwinnett Counties. This means it has gentle hills (probably no greater than 3-4% at maximum, I’m guesstimating). As you approach North DeKalb Mall, there is a long downslope starting at about kilometer 8. If you pace a 10k like I do, this is the time to start using up the rest of the gas in the tank, so to speak, and burn the last couple kilometers as quickly as possible. So, you’re picking up the pace coming down this incline, using it for all you are worth. Then you make the right turn onto Druid Hills. There’s a bit of an uphill here, sharp but not too bad. Then you make another right turn onto Mistletoe Road, with additional uphill, and then finally onto Mt. Olive Drive where you discover that the nice gentle downhills and uphills on Lawrencville Highway were lulling you into a false sense of security!

There is one very steep, but quick, climb just as you turn onto Mt. Olive at ~9.4k. For me, this wasn’t so bad except there was an equally steep downhill on the other side which I just didn’t have the legs to take advantage of. I’m of the school that says, “If it’s a steep downhill, get that turnover going and use it,” but my legs just weren’t going to go that fast, so I ended up wasting energy and time on the downslope (which will be explained as important in a second). Finally, the last half kilometer of the race is slightly upslope leading to the finish line.

I had been (sort of) aiming at a sub-50 time for this race and my pacing through the course had led me to think I could do it. Unfortunately, I’d left everything I had out on Lawrenceville Highway and especially on the two uphills leading into Mt. Olive Drive. All I could do for the last bit was hold on and try not to slow down. Faster wasn’t in the cards.

Final time was 50:01. Two seconds out of my unstated goal.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m happy with that time. It’s a PR by something like a minute and a half; it’s an excellent time for me. I also can’t say I didn’t run a good race. I managed negative or equal splits the whole way except for one uphill mile (switching to miles now, sorry) in the middle. Who’s to say that if I hadn’t used the downhill on kilometer 8-9, I’d have put up a slower time. However, if I had my druthers, I’d have liked to have pounded those last two hills into submission and not felt like I was just holding on for the finish. It would have been nice if I could have snipped those two seconds off the total time.

Mile splits were:
8:25
8:10
8:04
8:12 (uphill section)
8:01 (also had some uphill but I was nudging into high gear)
7:35 (mostly downhill but included most of the hills listed above)
1:34 (which calculates to a 12:37 mile pace)

Compare that last bit of mileage (0.2 km) to all the rest of the splits and you’ll see what I was getting at about the hills. Going from a constant 8:00 minute pace to 12:37 means that somebody ran out of oomph.

The lesson here is two-fold! Be aware of the late hills on this course and always check out the races you’re about to undertake.

As I said, I had a good race, it was fun, and I’d do it again. It was well-supported with plenty of volunteers and safety officers.

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The full race results for 2010 can be found at Active.com which is doing its best recently to piss me off in the same way ticketmaster does; by slapping “convenience fees” of rather extreme amounts onto race registration.